Family Matters.
When It Really Matters.

Insights into a North County Divorce Mediation

On Behalf of | May 15, 2020 | Mediation

Are you searching for insights into a North County divorce mediation?  How does the process work and why should you consider mediation in your case?

Mediation is an excellent tool for reducing the time and cost required to complete your divorce, and to actually make the process a bit easier to endure emotionally. A successful mediation will not only shield your children from a divorce filled with animosity, it will usually make life more stable once the divorce is completed. Many studies have shown parties who reach agreement in mediation are more likely to abide by those agreements after the divorce is finalized.

A few suggestions upon entering into a mediation:

1. In order to find common ground and help the parties to understand one another’s point of view, the mediator must listen intently to both sides. While it may appear at times that the mediator is nodding in approval or seemingly agreeing with your former spouse’s point of view, that doesn’t mean the mediator is taking sides. Quite the contrary, a strong mediator will openly approach both points of view seeking to get to the root of any challenge or area of disagreement or dispute and to gain each party’s initial position. The strong mediator will gain a full understanding of both points of view before guiding the conversation in a manner that helps to encourage settlement of the issue at hand.

2. Make sure you are well organized. The ATROs issued with your divorce summons require you to provide a transparent, accurate and complete accounting of all assets, debts, financial interests, business or professional practice ownership, retirement accounts and property. You have a fiduciary duty to each other to act in good faith. Have all the facts surrounding income, assets, accounts and liabilities clearly organized and ready for the conversation.

3. One of the most important insights into a North County divorce mediation may surprise you.  Neither party will “win” – especially before a Judge if your case were to go to litigation. The same is true in mediation. Be prepared to give a little to get what you want and need. It is important to understand that divorce settlements require give and take from both parties in order to reach a fair and equitable settlement. What is most important to you? Will a possession matter to you in 3 years? 5 years? What are the things which will matter to you over the perspective of a lifetime? An effective mediator will ensure that one party isn’t dominating and that each gives a little here and receives a little there.

In the end, mediation is a more dignified, cost-effective and less stressful way to resolve issues in a divorce and complete the process. It helps to resolve issues that may not be possible for two individuals to work through alone at this point in time, while ensuring that each person is in a safe environment based upon equality and fairness.

We hope you’ve found these insights into a North County divorce mediation as you consider options for resolving areas of dispute during your divorce.  If you have questions about mediation or would like to schedule an appointment with one of our Certified Family Law Specialists we invite you to contact us or call 760-389-3927 to schedule an appointment.