Family Matters.
When It Really Matters.

Why do people think it’s better to stay together for the kids?

On Behalf of | Jul 7, 2024 | Child Custody and Visitation

Have you ever met a couple that you feel is on the verge of divorce? They don’t get along, they are constantly arguing and both of them seem fundamentally unhappy. And yet, they stay together and refuse to get divorced.

If you ask them why, they may tell you that they know the marriage is not working. It has a lot of problems and it has for a long time. But they want to stay together for the kids. They believe that is always better for the children’s development to have two parents. They may even see staying married as a sort of sacrifice, giving up their own desire for divorce.

Involved parents

In many cases, research does show that children should have two involved parents. This gives them a sense of stability and helps them create these early relationships. They learn things from both parents, they create an emotional connection with both of them and these children generally tend to have better development, both academically and socially. Having two involved parents is good for children, the studies show.

But what some research has also found is that these parents don’t necessarily have to be married. They can both stay involved as co-parents, giving the children the same developmental benefits. On top of that, there is some evidence that high-conflict relationships can negatively damage a child’s development. So parents who stay together in a high-conflict marriage may be doing more harm than good, even if they don’t realize it.

Your legal options

If you and your spouse are thinking of getting divorced, it can be complicated with children. Make sure you know exactly what parental rights you have and what legal steps to take.