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Is it Possible to Keep the Divorce Friendly for the Sake of the Children?

On Behalf of | Apr 10, 2021 | Divorce

Is it possible to keep the divorce friendly for the sake of the children?  San Diego parents who are ending their marriages may get so wrapped up in accusations against one another they could forget about how their children will also be involved and ultimately affected. Divorce turns the entire family’s world upside down.  Parents considering divorce should put the best interests of their children first in accordance with California law and the findings of a recent University study.

In a recent study published by the City University of New York (CUNY) a child’s age may play a significant role in how the process and handle a divorce. Research suggests that while older children tend to suffer when parents’ divorce, younger children, in most cases, suffer more.

It is possible to keep the divorce friendly for the sake of the children and to consider each step in the process from the child(ren)’s perspective.  Parents considering a divorce in Carlsbad or anywhere in San Diego should be trying to do what is best for their children as they may be the most affected by the change in family structure.  Careful consideration must be given to every aspect of child custody and parenting time.  However, the first step for parents considering a divorce may be to develop a strategy for how they will prepare the children and ultimately inform them of the decision to divorce.

Other recent studies have shown the fighting between the former spouses will actually affect the kids more than the divorce itself.

It may surprise you to learn it is in your own best interests to develop strategies to reduce or eliminate disputes.  Consider this idea: the Court will literally read every email and text you send and listen to every voicemail you leave for your former spouse.  Every communication can in fact be entered into evidence and used against you.

Agree in advance of telling the children about the impending divorce to avoid arguing in front of your child(ren) and to keep things professional in tone and in every communication.  If you sense a “conversation” in any form is beginning to agitate you, literally set it down and come back to it when you are calm and have had time to gather and organize your thoughts.

It is best for both parents to present a united front in matters related to the children.  Talk to your child(ren) often.  Tell them how much they are loved and that they are still a family.  Ask them how they are feeling and if they have any questions throughout the entire process, not just at the outset.

It is possible to keep the divorce friendly for the sake of the children.  This is in the best interests of the children and it will help to maintain your own level of calm and balance throughout the process of your divorce.  Learn more about proven strategies and how to protect your own interests and contact us or call 760-389-3927 to schedule an appointment for a remote or socially distanced consultation with one of our experienced Certified Family Law Specialists.