It may or may not surprise you to learn that highly contested divorces in San Diego often reflect personality disorders or other behavioral issues in one or both of the parties. Many couples who are approaching a divorce want to try to work through things as productively as possible, perhaps even seeking a more amicable end of their marriage. However, if one or both of the parties are prone to engage in highly dramatic of contentious behavior you will need the help of the experienced, proven Certified Family Law Specialists at Burke & Domercq. What are a few of the classic examples of this behavior?
Borderline Personality Disorder
Those who struggle with a borderline personality disorder may find it difficult to maintain a relationship, but they tend to fear abandonment or separation even more. Those with a borderline personality disorder often suffer mood swings and view things as more “black and white” or “all or nothing.” Highly contested divorces in San Diego are often the result of a former spouse with a borderline personality disorder desperately attempting to avoid separation, control events or at least find some degree of still have a connection. The best strategy in these cases is to empathize with the mood swings while maintaining consistent control of your own emotions. Think about maintaining calm, focused communications and consistent patterns.
Narcissism is one of the most common recipes for highly contested divorces in San Diego. Classic narcissism involves a person who sees everything from their own point of view. The world revolves around them and everyone and everything in that world exists to serve their interests. Narcissists, who are often perfectionists, tend to seek control and attention while blaming everyone else for what is happening to them. If your former spouse is a narcissist you need to develop a strategy for not only the divorce, but life after the divorce. This is especially true when children, custody & parenting time are involved. The key to managing any interaction with a narcissist is to limit reactions and avoid adding energy to any situation. It is important to understand their skewed perceptions of reality and take everything they offer with a grain of salt. It is best to focus upon the facts of the situation and the available options while avoiding any specific personal opinion or conjecture. Keep things focused upon “issue(s)/option(s).”
Highly contested divorces in San Diego often feature over-protective parents, parental alienation (turning children against the other parent) and volatile communication patterns.
Our Certified Family Law Specialists will work with you to develop specific strategies to reduce conflict, manage communications and maintain decorum. The Judge in highly contested divorces in San Diego will carefully observe how each party comports themselves both within and outside the courtroom. Your ability to successfully develop, implement and manage strategies will go a long way to helping you to successfully accomplish your goals and objectives for the divorce.