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Discussing a Potential Divorce with your Spouse

On Behalf of | Jul 12, 2019 | Divorce

Discussing a potential divorce with your spouse is one of the most crucial and complex conversations you may ever have.  It can also have a tremendous impact on the divorce itself and your own specific goals and objectives.

The conversation of a divorce carries a complex array of emotional, spiritual and financial implications.  It will impact the every aspect of your life from how much time you get to spend with each child, where you live, who you spend your time with and how your monthly budget will work going forward.

Divorce is obviously a very emotional issue and usually a very difficult decision.  Many people describe the process of a divorce as “daunting, frightening, or too much to think about” not to mention the sadness, disappointment, hurt, anger and fear which accompany an uncertain future.

However, one of the least important ingredients when discussing a potential divorce with your spouse is emotion.  Emotion often clouds judgment and will actually play almost no role at all in how the divorce will be handled by the court.  In the end, California laws will dictate the process and outcome of your divorce and the emotions of the parties will have little to no impact on the decisions taken by the Judge in your case.

This may sound a bit odd, but you should approach this conversation much like you would a business related conversation.  This is why it is so important to contact the experienced Carlsbad divorce and family law attorneys at Burke & Domercq or call 760-389-3927 to schedule an appointment.  You need sound counsel as you prepare for this important conversation.

Everything you say carries potential weight in court.  Avoid conversations regarding the value of specific assets or even how custody and parenting time are going to be handled.  The divorce is about bringing an end to your marriage.  The initial conversation should not get into who’s going to get the kids or the value of your home or business.  It’s simply about the issues at hand relating to your marriage and the reasons to bring it to an end.

Avoid angry confrontation.  Do not reply to harsh texts or email (but save them).  Do not engage in any back-and-forth and if it arises it is usually best to withdraw until the emotions have dissipated a bit.  Discussing a potential divorce with your spouse can set your world on fire.  It could also actually help to lay the groundwork for a smooth and cost-effective process and the accomplishment of your goals.  Your preparation and approach will make all the difference in your world.