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What Control Do You have over a Divorce in San Diego?

On Behalf of | Apr 30, 2021 | Divorce

What control do you have over a divorce in San Diego?  What is “control” in terms of a divorce in the San Diego area, and why is it important to understand this concept as it applies to ending a marriage. For the purposes of this discussion, “control” is the ability to influence or impact decisions or outcomes relating to all aspects of the “Separation Agreement” including the division of assets and liabilities, as well as issues of parenting time, child custody and financial support.

In order for a divorce to be completed in California, all issues contained within the separation agreement must be addressed and fully resolved.   This includes:

  • The division of all marital assets and debts/liabilities (including business interests and retirement accounts)
  • Spousal support and child support (if any)
  • Parenting time and Child Custody

Most parties entering into a divorce have various levels of disagreement within these areas of the separation agreement. Some disagreements are mild, some are quite emotional and entrenched in belief and principle.  Based upon our decades of experience we can tell you:

A person who is ending their marriage has the greatest amount of control and influence over what happens when they are able to work through the fog of emotion, and learn to work constructively to find common ground.

If you want to complete a divorce you and your former spouse must ultimately reach agreement on every single issue in the separation agreement.

In either event, before orders are finalized all areas of disagreement must be resolved.  Resolution can be accomplished by:

  1. Agreements reached by the parties themselves
  2. Agreements reached by the parties and their attorneys (Negotiation)
  3. Mediation: resolution between the parties, represented by their attorneys and guided by a mediator

What control do you have over a divorce in San Diego?  You have the ability to control you own actions and communications.  You have the ability to work to control your emotions and work through the challenges at hand.

If you cannot reach agreement the Judge will decide the matter.  It is important to understand the parties ultimately have no control over the final decisions of the Judge.  Each side presents their case and the Judge, a total stranger, issues a decision which is almost never a “win” or a “loss” for either side.  In fact, in many cases both sides feel like they have lost once they hear the decision of the Court.

There are areas of genuine principle which are worth fighting for, and Burke & Domercq has a strong track record of success in family law litigation when necessary.

As you move from negotiation between the parties and a decision by the Judge the amount of influence or control that you, as a person, have over the path of your divorce in the San Diego area diminishes.

It is also important to note that as you move through this list the elements of cost and time rise exponentially as well.

If you wish to retain the greatest amount of influence and “control” over the course of your divorce you should give careful consideration to a few general concepts:

Emotional decisions are rarely sound decisions

What am I committed to keeping, protecting or preserving?

What are the “best interests” of our child(ren)?

What do I want life to look like after the divorce is completed?

The answer to the question “What control do you have over a divorce in San Diego?” is “a lot, but it takes preparation, strategy and consistent discipline throughout the divorce.” This process isn’t simply about ending your marriage. It’s also about crafting the new life which will follow.  The experienced Certified Family Law Specialists at Burke & Domercq will be with you and provide sound advice and counsel every step of the way.

Protect your own interests and contact us or call 760-389-3927 to schedule an appointment for a remote or socially distanced consultation with one of our experienced Certified Family Law Specialists.